My Big Fat Doctor Who Foe Wishlist
Now that everyone on the planet knows that Matt Smith (not the one who wrote Manic Miner, I hasten to add) is the next Doctor Who, the tabloids are scurrying to guess who the next companion will be.
Me, I’d rather play guess the bad guys. After all, who is scarier? Catherine Tate, or the Weeping Angels. Don’t answer that one.
So here’s Greywulf’s patented Top Ten Foes I’d love to see return in the 2009 specials or the 2010 series. Or anytime, really.
Dude, gotta have The Rani! A companionless Doctor needs a gorgeous sexy scheming Time Lady to battle. Originally played by Kate O’Mara, there’s only one person who could fill her….. shoes – Catherine Zeta-Jones! I’m sure that her love of all things Welsh could lure her back. And she is used to working alongside someone who looks 900 years old, so she should be just fine alongside the Doctor.
But surely all of the other Time Lords are dead, I hear you ask. Ah yes, I reply – but the Dalek Emperor was removed from Time, remember, meaning what he did in the Time War never happened! So if the Doctor actually thought to pay a visit to where Gallifrey was, he’ll probably find that it still is, and all those Time Lords and Ladies who died, aren’t any more. Oh, the Paradox.
Or something, anyway.
Hot on the heels of The Rani is The Master who was last seen playing the part of a rather nice barbeque. Enter one red nail-polished hand to snarf his ring, and close for credits. This was intentionally left as an open hook by Russel T Davros, and I’m hoping Steve Moffat and makes it The Rani’s hand (see above). Oh, and that ditzy blonde “wife”. The Chameleon android, definitely. Watch the way she moves. Not even women from Essex walk like that.
I’ll have a quarter-pounder Masterburger, please.
Me likeee little potato headed warriors, and the Cybermen need a rest and oil change now. OK?
Mighty Morphin’ Power Sontarans! I love you, internet.
The Human Doctor
Yep! I’ll bet that David Tenant returns as the human Doctor clone-hand-thingy from the parallel universe who attempts to unlock the memories from Donna Noble in order to make himself fully a Time Lord and thus save his parallel universe from Some Bad Things. The Matt Smith Doctor meets him, tries to stop him, then helps ultimately helps him. Gotta love some Dr vs. Dr action! It’s like Kramer vs Kramer with sonic screwdrivers. Damn. I should write the scripts myself. Add in the Doctor’s Daughter who thinks that David Tenant really is the Doctor, and it’ll be one huge custody battle. Just like Kramer vs Kramer, then.
No, you’re not.
The Ice Warriors of Mars
Go on. Just the name sends goose-bumps down your spine. Admit it. Say it out loud. See, now you want them too, don’t you?
Oh God yes.
The Weeping Angels
According to my boys, Blink was the scariest and one of the best episodes to date. They’re new iconic monsters for this Dr Who age and deserve some centre-stage time against the Doctor himself. Oh yeh!
The Meddling Monk
This is a dude who may or may not be a future incarnation of the Doctor/Master who messes with Time for the kicks. He’s like a bored Cadfael. Drop him into a story and you’ve got a license to arm Saracens with laser pistols, have Hitler win World War XII and all sorts of other manicness. Is that a word?
I know what you did last Vespers.
The Time Agents from the 51st Century
Or whatever the organisation Jack Harkness was supposed to be a member of. I want to know more about these timecops. Just curious, that’s all.
Like the Weeping Angels they’re a new invention who proved a decent enough hit with the audience, so let’s see more of these aliens who absorb the physical features of those they conquer. And not have them defeated by chip-fat this time. A Doctor race-against-time to stop the Krillitane defeating the Weeping Angels (and thus gaining their powers) would be awesome, and showcase two bad dudes at the same time with the Doctor having to side with one against the other.
Coming to a D&D Scenario near you!
And at Number Ten………..
Lots and lots of new monsters! Steve Moffat has promised us these. Let’s hope he delivers, by the starship load!!
Roll on the Easter Special!